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Racing thoughts that make it so you can’t sleep can be caused by stress, anxiety, mental illness, medications, or excessive caffeine consumption. Such thoughts can be hard to control, cause you to feel overwhelmed, and make it difficult or impossible to sleep. If you experience racing thoughts at night, you are far from alone.

Many of us experience them at one time or another, especially during heightened stress. Others have them as part of a mental health condition such as a mood or sleep disorder. Either way, racing thoughts at night do not have to be your fate. Read on to learn why they happen, as well as helpful and effective ways to cope with and treat racing thoughts at night.

Racing Thoughts at Night vs. the Day

Some people who experience racing thoughts at night also experience racing or anxious thoughts during the day. But many people also have the experience of feeling relatively calm during the day, only to find that their thoughts start to race as soon as they try falling asleep.

The reason for this is that most of us are more easily distracted from our worries and fears during the day. We are working, caring for others, indulging in screen time, and moving rapidly from one activity to another. As a result, we are barely aware of our interior emotional experience.

But when everything goes dark and quiet at night, we find ourselves alone with our thoughts. This provides the opportunity for darker, more difficult emotions and worries to present themselves.

What Do Racing Thoughts at Night Feel Like?

Racing thoughts are thoughts that come on suddenly and seem to populate your mind without you being able to control them. Some common experiences include:

• A list of thoughts that stream through your mind on a loop
• The feeling that you are watching different thoughts and scenarios play themselves out in your mind, as if on a movie reel
• The thoughts seem to come in quick succession, as though someone is talking too fast inside your head
• You may also be experiencing other signs of anxiety that accompany these racing thoughts, such as a racing heartbeat, sweating, or sped-up breathing

For example, imagine that you’re finally settling in for the night. You’re tired and ready to get some rest. But as soon as the lights go out and your head hits the pillow, your thoughts start racing.

You begin to think about your to-do list or the endless worries you have about the day and weeks ahead. Or maybe you begin thinking about something embarrassing or scary that happened to you years ago. You may be ruminating on a “worst case scenario” situation you imagine happening sometime in the future.

Whatever your thoughts are, you can’t stop them from coming. As the thoughts race, your heart pounds too and it feels like you will never get to sleep. This all feels unfair! The night is supposed to be when you finally get to unwind and relax; however, your racing thoughts make that feel impossible.

What Causes Racing Thoughts at Night?

Life stressors—such as job stress, familial stress, financial stress, or experiencing a major life transition—are a frequent cause of racing thoughts at night. This is likely the case if the experience of racing thoughts at night is new to you and can be traced to a new stressor or stressful event.

Racing thoughts at night can also be attributed to mental health disorders, especially anxiety disorders. Experiencing racing thoughts at night might be something experienced frequently, or intermittently by people with a mental health condition, and can be exacerbated by difficult life circumstances.

Here are some of the most common causes of racing thoughts at night.

Life Stresses and Transitions

Experiencing a job loss, worrying about your financial future, moving, and having a baby. These are all examples of major life changes or stressors that can cause you to experience racing thoughts at night.

Anxiety and Panic Disorder

People with anxiety tend to have more trouble sleeping and may experience racing thoughts at night. Panic disorder can also make you more likely to experience this. Sometimes racing thoughts at night resemble symptoms of a panic attack.

Bipolar Disorder

Racing thoughts are one of the characteristics of bipolar disorder, especially during a manic episode. However, simply having racing thoughts does not mean you have bipolar disorder.

Bipolar disorder has other symptoms as well, including intense mood fluctuations, engaging in risky behavior, and experiencing delusions or hallucinations. Bipolar disorder requires a proper diagnosis from a physician or psychiatrist.

Obsessive Compulsive Disorder

People with obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) may have racing thoughts. Usually, nighttime isn’t the only time that people with OCD experience racing thoughts. Obsessive thoughts, compulsions, and fixations on things like order and cleanliness are other common characteristics of OCD.

Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD)

Experiencing a trauma, either recently or years ago, can cause post-traumatic stress disorder. Symptoms of the disorder include racing thoughts, including at night. In this case, you may fixate on the traumatic event that happened to you and experience flashbacks to it.

Medications

Certain prescribed medications, either for mental health or to treat a medical condition, can cause racing thoughts and insomnia. Additionally, racing thoughts and insomnia can be symptoms of withdrawal from certain medications, including opioids.

Recreational Drugs

Certain illegal drugs can cause racing thoughts. Examples of drugs that can create this effect include methamphetamine and cocaine.

Caffeine Consumption

Consuming caffeine, especially too close to bedtime, can make it hard to fall asleep and cause your thoughts to race. Some people are more sensitive to the effects of caffeine than others.

Tips for Coping With Racing Thoughts at Night

For many, making a few life changes and adopting some healthy habits to cope with stress can help reduce or eliminate nighttime ruminations and insomnia. Here are some tips.

Keep a “Worry Journal”

Writing down some of your thoughts and fears before you go to bed can be therapeutic and help reduce nighttime stress. Often, our stressful thoughts boil to the surface at night, but they are still in our heads the rest of the day. Having an outlet to “let them all out” when it’s not late at night can really help.

To get started:

• Get a notebook and label it “worry journal.”
• Take 5-10 minutes a day to list your worries.
• Alternatively, spend 5-10 minutes doing some freewriting about whatever thoughts come to mind.

Meditation

Meditation, whether right before bed or sometime during the day, can have a strong impact on your ability to fall asleep without overwhelming thoughts. If this is your first time adopting a meditation practice, keep it simple. You can start with just a few minutes a day and then go from there.

If you need help falling asleep, there are several apps on the market that will guide you through meditation, including Aura’s sleep app. There is no “right” way to meditate; just closing your eyes in silence for a few minutes a day is enough.

Decrease Screen Time Before Bed

Many of us are addicted to our screens and stay on them all day, through bedtime. Unfortunately, these habits have a tendency to wreak havoc on our ability to fall asleep easily and can cause us to have a racing mind at the end of the day.

Additionally, too much screen time before bed, along with “blue light” emitted from screens, can cause a decrease in melatonin levels. This can make it more difficult to fall asleep.

Be Mindful of Your Evening Media Consumption

Watching scary TV or movies, or reading disturbing books right before bed, can impact our sleep and cause racing thoughts. Many of us have become addicted to “doomscrolling” too, feeling compelled to keep up with upsetting world events and news.

Address Your Life Stressors

Some aspects of life are out of our control, and these situations can contribute to heightened stress and anxiety, along with insomnia. But sometimes, experiencing something like racing thoughts before bed can be looked at as a wake-up call to make life changes to reduce stress.

Maybe it’s time to leave a toxic job or you might need to address the dysfunction in one of your primary relationships. Empower yourself to make changes that will allow you to live a healthier, less stressful life.

Treatment Options for Racing Thoughts at Night

If you are experiencing racing thoughts at night and trying different coping tips doesn’t seem to be helping, it might be time to seek professional help. Engaging in counseling or therapy is a great option for dealing with racing thoughts at night and insomnia. Talking to a psychiatrist or physician about medication options may be a good choice for you too.

Therapy

Your counselor or therapist can help you figure out what’s causing your racing nighttime thoughts, including what life stressors may be impacting you. They can also help identify whether or not you have a mental health condition that may be contributing to these thought patterns.

One of the most successful types of therapy to deal with anxiety, insomnia, and symptoms like racing thoughts is cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT). CBT helps you become more aware of your thoughts and learn coping strategies for quieting them down. CBT also helps you manage your anxiety and begin to recognize signs of it before it is able to take completely over.

Medication

If you are experiencing chronic anxiety, generalized anxiety, panic disorder, or another mental health challenge, there are medications available to help you manage your feelings. Common medications for anxiety include anti-anxiety drugs like benzodiazepines and antidepressants.

These medications can also help you fall asleep more easily. Your healthcare provider may also be able to prescribe you sleeping pills to help with racing thoughts and falling asleep.

Final Words

Having racing thoughts at night doesn’t have to be your reality forever. You might feel hopeless, as though you will never get a chance again to settle easily into sleep. If you feel basically “fine” during the day, you may think that pursuing methods for reducing your racing thoughts at night isn’t important or worth it.

But having difficulty falling asleep, experiencing heightened stress at bedtime, and not getting enough sleep can impact your physical and mental health. There are effective solutions out there to address your racing nighttime thoughts, and you deserve a peaceful night’s sleep.

If your child or teen has been diagnosed with depression, obsessive-compulsive disorder, or panic disorder, your doctor may have recommended Prozac. While Prozac (fluoxetine) is often prescribed for adults, it is also an approved antidepressant for children ages 8 and older.

Prozac is a commonly prescribed medication for children and teens with major depressive disorder (MDD) and sometimes bipolar disorder. While it’s not advised that Prozac be prescribed to every child with depression, it can be part of a successful treatment plan for some.

Before your child begins taking Prozac, it’s important that you understand its potential side effects. Have a conversation with your child’s doctor and be sure to monitor your child’s mood and behavior carefully if they do start taking it.

Prozac for Kids and Teens: What Does It Do?

Prozac is one of the most commonly prescribed selective serotonin reuptake inhibitor (SSRI) medications for adults, and it has been shown to also be effective for kids. SSRIs may help improve mood by increasing the amount of serotonin in the brain.

Serotonin is a neurotransmitter that helps regulate mood and emotions, sleep, and appetite. SSRIs work to make serotonin accessible again so that the body can receive its benefits.

SSRIs can make it easier for people to cope with various conditions like mood disorders, eating disorders, obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD), and panic attacks.

Side Effects of Prozac for Kids and Teens

Prozac is generally well-tolerated in children, and few stop taking it because of bothersome side effects. The side effects of Prozac are often mild and short-lasting. If side effects occur, they usually show up at the start of treatment and often resolve within a few weeks without any need for additional intervention.

Common Side Effects

Common side effects associated with Prozac may include:

• Appetite changes (increase or decrease)
• Gastrointestinal symptoms (e.g., nausea, upset stomach, and diarrhea)
• Headaches
• Restless legs
• Restlessness
• Sedation
• Sleep changes (e.g., insomnia, somnolence, vivid dreams, nightmares, and impaired sleep)
• Sweating

Less Common Side Effects 

Additionally, a small percentage of children who take Prozac may show increased impulsivity, agitation, or irritability. These symptoms appear to be more likely in children with bipolar disorder or those who are predisposed to develop it.

Serious Side Effects

Although rare, Prozac is associated with certain more serious side effects. If you notice any of the following in your child, contact a healthcare provider immediately:

• New or worsening anxiety or depression symptoms
• Panic attacks (e.g., difficulty breathing or racing heartbeat)
• Problems with coordination
• Severe agitation or restlessness
• Symptoms of mania (e.g., racing thoughts, pressured and fast speech, or excessive risk-taking)
• Uncontrollable anger or violence
• Unusual changes in behavior or mood

Increased Thoughts of Suicide

Another serious side effect associated with Prozac that warrants special attention is the risk of suicidal thoughts or behavior. Though it’s important for everyone to be aware of suicidal ideation and self-harm signs in youth, it’s even more imperative when children are taking an SSRI.

Some of the warning signs include an increase in sadness, isolation, panic attacks, or aggressiveness. These may be subtle and lead to thoughts about suicide or dying, suicide attempts, or self-injury.

Risks and Benefits of Prozac for Kids

Compared to other common antidepressants, Prozac appears to carry fewer risks for children with depression. However, before making the decision to start treatment with an SSRI, you should carefully weigh the expected benefits and risks—including potential side effects—of the drug.

While many side effects may resolve with time, a child should not suffer unnecessarily from additional complications. There are many different treatment options that can help minimize the potential for these side effects.

How do Kids and Teens Take Prozac?

If your child is taking Prozac, there are some safety precautions to keep in mind. Make sure they are only taking their prescribed dosage, supervise them when they take Prozac, and store the medication properly.

Prozac comes in capsule form; however, the generic versions that contain fluoxetine come in liquid, tablet, or capsule form.

Dosage of Prozac

For kids with major depressive disorder, 10 or 20 milligrams (mg) of Prozac per day is the general recommendation by the FDA.

A doctor will usually start a child off on a lower dose (10 mg per day) of Prozac and increase it to 20 mg or 30mg per day if their symptoms don’t improve. Teens are also started out on 10mg per day, and it is then increased to 20mg within a few weeks. Adolescents may need to take 40mg or 60mg per day to achieve the desired effect.

For children with OCD, the dosing is similar to treating depression. The FDA recommends they start at 10 mg per day and increase in a few weeks to 20 mg per day. For adolescents and children of a higher weight, the FDA has approved treatment of up to 60 mg per day if lower doses are not effective.

Supervising Your Child

A child shouldn’t take Prozac alone. It’s best that you, or another trusted adult, oversee its administration.

Prozac is taken once per day. Your child may take the medication with food, but it is not necessary. If your child is taking a liquid form of Prozac, be sure you measure it with a dosing spoon or oral syringe before administering it.

Prozac should be taken at around the same time every day. Try using an alarm on your phone or writing a note on your calendar to remember to have your child take it. If your child misses a dose of Prozac, they may take another dose—unless it is closer to the time of the next dose. You should never double your child’s Prozac dose.

Storage

Prozac should be stored in a room-temperature location. Avoid any place with too much light, heat, and/or moisture. For instance, it’s best not to keep Prozac in the bathroom.

Keep Prozac in the container provided to you by your pharmacist and make sure the lid is tightly closed. Be sure to keep Prozac out of reach of your child or any other children or pets in the house—especially if the medication isn’t kept in a childproof container.

If your child is no longer taking Prozac, don’t dispose of it in the toilet or anywhere else could access it and consume it. You can talk to your local pharmacist to learn the best way to dispose of Prozac. Some pharmacies participate in a “take-back” program and can safely dispose of Prozac for you.

Have you ever had the feeling that someone you’re talking to is not telling the truth? Or that what they’re saying doesn’t match up with the facts? Over time, have you caught this person in multiple lies, some small, and others big? If so, you may wonder if the person could be a pathological liar. 

With insights from a psychologist, this article will go over what pathological lying is, how it compares to other kinds of lying, and what to do if you’re dealing with a pathological liar.

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What Is Pathological Lying?

Most people tell the occasional fib, but some people lie more often and even do so unconsciously, says Aimee Daramus, PsyD, a licensed clinical psychologist.

While a pathological liar is not a mental health diagnosis on its own, according to the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, Fifth Edition (DSM-5), it can be a feature of mental health conditions.

While it’s not clear what causes compulsive lying, we know that lying is a complex process in the brain. And we know that pathological lying differs from other types of lying because it’s problematic.

Pathological Lying vs. Other Types of Lying

Most people would be lying if they said they had never told a lie, but at what point does lying become pathological? Here are the differences between telling the occasional lie, lying compulsively, and lying pathologically.

Non-Pathological Lying (Normal or Natural Lying)

It’s natural for people to make the conscious choice to lie occasionally—either for their own or for someone else’s benefit.

For example, you may decide to lie to: 

• Be kind or spare someone else from getting their feelings hurt by the truth (e.g., your coworker makes you banana bread for your birthday, and you tell them it’s delicious even though the recipe used walnuts, which you hate, but you don’t want them to feel bad since they were just trying to be nice).
• Avoid getting in trouble (e.g., you accidentally break an expensive vase and blame the cat).
• Finesse a social situation (e.g., you’re at a party and want to go home, so you tell the host you have to be up early in the morning for work even though you don’t really).
• Prevent yourself from looking incompetent (e.g., you couldn’t finish a report on time and tell your boss that the computer didn’t save your work).

These “normal” or “white lies” are small fibs that are generally harmless and meant to avoid harm rather than intentionally deceiving or causing hurt.

That said, most people have other coping skills to help them through life situations and don’t rely on lying to navigate their daily responsibilities and relationships.

Compulsive or Pathological Lying

Compulsive lying is often used interchangeably with pathological lying, and some experts don’t make a clear distinction between the two. Some experts don’t use the term “compulsive” lying at all. Others find that there can be a little more nuance on the spectrum of lying behavior that using the terms “compulsive” or “pathological” differently can help explain.

While there is a lack of agreement about whether the two terms are separate, they both refer to problematic lying that is out of control. A person who tells lies without thinking —almost like a reflex— is lying compulsively. The lying may not have a specific intent behind it, such as trying to get something or avoid a consequence.

Lying Compulsively

Since their default response is to lie, telling the truth may feel uncomfortable to a person who compulsively lies.

Compulsive liars may have started lying in childhood to cope or protect themselves. They may have lied about so much and for so long that it has become a habit they can’t stop. Some lies may have elements of truth, like certain people, places, or details that are accurate.

The things compulsive liars lie about can vary. For example, they may lie about what they did over the weekend when a coworker asks, even though they have no reason not to be truthful.

While you might assume that someone who lies compulsively always tells lies that make them look good, that’s not always the case. When lying is an automatic reaction to a situation, a person may end up telling a lie that casts them in a negative light.

Some people who are compulsively lying are very aware of the behavior and are distressed by it, particularly as the lies start to add up, and it becomes difficult to keep track of the “web” of lies they’ve told. They may want to stop lying but feel like they can’t because it’s out of their control.

If a person is receptive to treatment, strategies like talk therapy and cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) may be able to help them learn why they lie and start working on changing their behavior. For example, they may identify certain emotions and settings (like low self-esteem at work) that trigger them to lie.

Lying Pathologically

Some providers have suggested that pathological lying is different from other types of lying because it’s excessive (a person tells multiple lies a day) and has gone on for at least six months).

Like other problematic lying, pathological lying can be unconscious and without any obvious gain. However, it can also be intended to manipulate others. For example, a person who lies pathologically may tell lies to establish status in their social groups instead of honestly and genuinely working on building up their reputation.

‌Another example could be far more detailed and complex: a pathological liar may completely make up their “backstory” and lie about where they grew up, what their parents did for work, and where they went to school. They may even claim to be related to an important historical figure or celebrity.

Even though pathological lying is not a diagnosis on its own, it can be a characteristic of people with certain mental health conditions, like antisocial personality disorder and narcissistic personality disorder, as well as those with psychopathic traits.

Lying can also be associated with other mental health conditions, but to a lesser extent—for example, a person with OCD may lie about their compulsions, or someone with an eating disorder may lie about having had a meal.

That said, not all pathological liars would meet the diagnostic criteria for one of those mental health disorders, and lying on its own is not enough to make a diagnosis.

Consequences of Compulsive Lying

No matter what caused a person to become a compulsive liar, someone who pathologically lies will eventually have to face the consequences of the behavior in their life and relationships. However, a pathological liar will continue to lie despite these negative effects.

If you call out a pathological liar, chances are they’ll deny the lie. If you present them with any kind of evidence to show that a lie “doesn’t add up,” they’ll likely come up with even more lies to explain or cover up the first lie.

While some people who lie will feel remorse and even guilt and shame when caught, pathological liars may not feel bad about it or have any inclination to stop.

Mental Health Effects of Dealing with Pathological Liars

Daramus says that when you’re dealing with someone who lies all the time, you’ll always be in a state of uncertainty when you’re around them. The uncertainty becomes exhausting and stressful because you’re constantly checking whether the person’s words match their actions.

Being lied to can feel a lot like gaslighting, says Daramus, the difference is that someone who’s gaslighting you has a strategy. While the actions of a pathological liar may be clearly intentional at times, they can be seemingly random at others. Some people who lie all the time are not even aware that they’re doing it and may not recognize the effects it’s having on their relationships.

Dealing with someone who is lying to you can also make you frustrated, angry, or hurt. It can be difficult to trust them and build a relationship with them.

How to Cope with a Pathological Liar

If someone in your life is a compulsive liar, know that it’s not your job to fix them. Remember that some people who are pathological liars are dealing with underlying mental health conditions that need professional treatment.

You can encourage them to seek mental health treatment and offer support. Model honesty and openness in your conversations and come from a nonjudgmental place. 

If you plan to confront someone about their lying, be aware that they may deny it or respond with more lies. A pathological liar may even become hostile when confronted. Make it clear that you don’t want to interact with them if they’re not going to be honest with you. 

Here are some strategies Daramus says can help you cope with a person in your life who lies pathologically:

• Pay attention to their actions instead of their words: Since it can be hard to trust the words of a person who lies pathologically, “one of the most effective things you can do is read the person’s actions. Actions don’t lie, and over time you’ll spot patterns that will help you predict their future behavior,” says Daramus.
• Set boundaries: If your loved one is in a pattern of lying, you need to be clear that you see it and you won’t tolerate it. “It’s important to set boundaries in your relationship with the person to protect yourself. If they don’t have a lot of insight or willingness to change, you might have to set boundaries with yourself about how much you’ll give to that relationship,” says Daramus.
• Know when to leave the relationship: If you are unable to cope with the person’s lies or their reaction to being confronted makes you feel unsafe, you may need to end your relationship with them. “However, this may not always be easy to do, if the person is a family member or coworker, for instance,” says Daramus.

Summary

Everyone lies occasionally, but excessive, problematic lying can cause serious distress for people and the others around them. If someone you care about lies constantly, you may feel like you can’t keep up with all their lies and frustrated that they won’t be truthful with you. A compulsive or pathological liar needs help from a mental health professional to recognize their behavior and address any underlying conditions that the lying could be a symptom of. 

Since being around a pathological liar can be exhausting, you may need to put up boundaries with them and make it clear that you won’t interact with them if they’re not being truthful, but you will support them in getting help.

Empathy involves the ability to understand what other people are experiencing. It plays an essential role in building social connections and promotes prosocial behaviors. However, not everyone experiences empathy for others in every situation, which can have a variety of individual and societal consequences. 

What can you do if you or a loved one lack empathy? First, it’s important to establish boundaries, nurture your relationship with other people, and avoid seeking emotional validation from that person. Read on for signs that may indicate a lack of empathy and tips for dealing with those who do.

Signs of a Lack of Empathy

A lack of empathy isn’t always easy to detect, but there are a few signs that can help you determine if you or a loved one might not be empathetic:

• Being extremely critical of other people
• Blaming the victim
• Not forgiving people for making mistakes
• Feeling like other people are too sensitive
• Not listening to other people’s perspectives or opinions
• An inability to cope with emotional situations
• Lack of patience for other people’s emotional reactions
• Reacting with impatience or anger when frustrated with other people
• Feeling baffled by other people’s feelings
• Believing that negative things won’t happen to you
• Not thinking about or understanding how your behavior affects other people

Factors that can impact how much empathy people feel for others include how well they know the other person, whether they like the individual, what they blame for the other person’s situation, past experiences, and expectations.

Causes

The exact causes of a lack of empathy aren’t entirely understood, but it is believed that a number of factors likely play a role. Empathy is believed to be largely influenced by genetics and socialization. 

Genetics play a part in the heritable aspects of personality and temperament. So some people are born with tendencies that make them more empathetic to others. However, experiences throughout life also play an important role.

Parents, teachers, peers, society, and culture affect how people feel about kindness, empathy, compassion, and helping behaviors.

Some conditions may play a role in a lack of empathy such as narcissistic personality disorder (NPD), antisocial personality disorder, and borderline personality disorder (BPD).

Effects

Lack of empathy can have a number of effects. Some of these include:

• Problems with relationships: People who lack empathy are more likely to have problems in their relationships with other people. It can lead to arguments when other people feel that their feelings and needs are not understood. It can also make it more difficult to form bonds and decrease the likelihood that people receive meaningful help.
• Poor communication: Not being able to understand where other people are coming from can make communication much more difficult. A lack of empathy can also cause people to misinterpret what other people are trying to say, which can ultimately lead to miscommunication, conflict, and damaged relationships.
• Lack of helping behaviors: When people don’t feel empathy for others, they are less likely to engage in prosocial actions that might help people who need assistance. This can affect people on an individual level, but it can also have more systemic effects when groups, governments, or societies fail to show empathy toward people who need support.

Lack of empathy can also have consequences in healthcare settings. Research suggests that healthcare workers’ empathy declines as a result of medical training. This can result in uncompassionate care, worse health outcomes, and poor patient experiences.

How to Develop Empathy

Empathy was once believed to be an inborn trait that could not be learned, but some researchers believe that this is a quality that people can develop and strengthen.

Research suggests that while empathy has biological underpinnings, it is heavily influenced by both social and situational factors. So, while some people might naturally have higher empathy levels, (i.e. empaths), you can become more empathetic with effort and practice.

Some strategies that can help you to become a more empathetic person include:

Observe

Spend time noticing what other people are doing and think about the emotions or thoughts that might be driving those actions. How would you feel if you were in the same situation? Are there aspects of the situation you haven’t considered? Are there things that you can do to help?

Listen

Make an intentional effort to listen to what other people are saying. The goal is to listen in order to understand. In addition to actively listening to what people are saying, pay attention to other cues that can tell you what people are feeling such as tone of voice, facial expressions, and body language.

Practice Identifying Emotions

Spend time identifying and labeling your emotional responses. It can be more challenging to understand what other people are feeling if you struggle to recognize the emotions that you are feeling and the effect they have on your behavior.

Practice showing yourself empathy may help you become better attuned to the emotional experiences of other people.

Work on Your Communication Skills

Interpersonal and communication skills play an important role in empathy. These abilities allow people to better engage with others and respond with supportive behaviors, which can help people to better experience and express empathy. 

In one longitudinal study of medical students in Japan, researchers found that targeted communication skills training helped increase empathy in the short term. Follow-up research, however, shows that these effects were not sustained years later.

Be Open to Emotions

Feeling empathy for others involves allowing yourself to feel what other people are feeling. This means allowing yourself to be open and vulnerable.

While this often involves experiencing challenging emotions, learning how to tolerate even the more distressing ones can help you forge stronger connections with other people. Doing this also allows other people to empathize with you and offer the support you need.

Use Emotions to Help Guide Action

Empathy is about more than just feeling sorrow or sympathy for what other people are going through. Because empathy allows you to feel what others may be feeling, it can also give you the motivation and sense of empowerment to take action.

How to Respond When People Lack Empathy

Frustrations and problems can also arise when people in your life seem to lack empathy. It can create challenges in your relationship if you feel like your loved one doesn’t empathize with your feelings. 

How should you respond to a loved one who lacks empathy?

• Establish boundaries: If the other person responds in a cruel or hurtful way, make it clear that the behavior is unacceptable. Explain that if they cannot be supportive, they should refrain from commenting or remove themselves from the situation.
• Nurture relationships with other people: Social support is critical to psychological well-being, so work on building healthy relationships with people who do have empathy.
• Don’t seek emotional validation from that person: It’s important to feel seen, heard, and understood, but you’re never going to get those things from a person who lacks empathy. Instead, practice self-acceptance and find people who will validate your emotions without criticizing or minimizing what you are feeling.
• Don’t expect them to change: People can build their empathetic skills, but you shouldn’t task yourself with making the other person change or waiting around for those things to happen. Instead, be supportive if they are making an effort, but don’t allow yourself to become responsible for “fixing” them.
• Walk away if necessary: If a close relationship with a person who lacks empathy is causing you pain and distress, it’s important to assess whether the relationship is worth keeping. If the connection is unhealthy and not suitable for your well-being, it might be time to consider ending it.
• Try not to take it personally: Remind yourself that it isn’t your fault—you aren’t responsible for other people’s emotional reactions (or lack thereof). Lack of empathy on the other person’s part is often unintentional and may stem from their problems, traumas, or experiences.

Perhaps most importantly, don’t let other people’s lack of empathy curtail your ability to connect with other people’s emotions. Some people won’t show care and concern for you or for the plight of others who might be suffering.