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Everyone experiences a lack of motivation from time to time. On days like this, you might feel tired, irritable, or just unable to stir your usual interest in the things you typically enjoy. 

Occasional periods of feeling this way are perfectly normal. It might mean that you’re under extra stress or trying to deal with something out of the ordinary in your life. These feelings are temporary and usually nothing serious. They can sometimes be a sign that you need to step back, take a break, and let your mind and body rest.

“It’s perfectly normal to be unmotivated to do a mentally challenging task after a mentally challenging day at work. Similarly, it would be normal not to be motivated to do physically challenging work after a day full of similar work,” says Tobias Dang, MD, a psychiatrist at Kaiser Permanente in Seattle, Washington. “The human mind and body have limited capacity to sustain effort without rest,” he explains.

At other times, these lingering feelings where you don’t feel like doing anything can be symptoms of more serious problems such as depression or some other type of mood disorder.

If these feelings seem like a more temporary state of mind, there are some things you can do to feel better and regain your motivation.

Check In With Yourself

On days when you don’t feel like doing anything, check in with yourself to make sure that you have the things you need to feel ok. Sometimes these moods can strike due to hunger, tiredness, thirst, or even feeling cooped up indoors.

According to Dr. Dang, such feelings can also stem from causes such as:

• Feeling upset about something you’ve experienced
• Attempting to avoid a task or interaction
• Feeling exhausted or overwhelmed

Consider your current state and make sure that you address any immediate physical or mental needs. By taking steps to shift your mood and care for yourself, you may find yourself feeling more inspired, motivated, and interested.

Take a Break

Feeling like you don’t want to do anything can be a sign that you’re stressed or burned out. Sometimes taking a break and spending some time taking care of yourself is the best thing you can do. 

Consider giving yourself a “mental health day” where you let go of your expectations of what you think you are supposed to accomplish. Instead, focus on doing things that help you feel restored and comforted. 

Let yourself enjoy a nap or lounge with a cozy blanket and your favorite book. The key is to spend this time relaxing and letting your mind and body rest.

Treat Yourself Kindly

Self-compassion involves not only being kind to yourself but also understanding that your experiences are part of being human and being mindful of your own emotions, the good and the bad.

Showing yourself some compassion and consideration can have important mental health benefits. Research has found that when people show compassion to themselves, it can help alleviate the negative effects of stress, reduce feelings of depression and anxiety, and lower overall psychological distress.

So if you’re having one of those days when you really don’t feel like doing anything, treat yourself with a little kindness. Accept it, accept yourself, and allow yourself space, time, and things that you need.

Go for a Walk

Taking a stroll combines the benefits of exercise and spending time outdoors. Exercise has been shown to be effective in both the treatment and prevention of depressive symptoms.

Research also suggests that spending time outdoors has a wide range of mental health benefits. One 2019 study found that contact with nature was linked to better well-being, better mood, more positive social interactions, and increased happiness and well-being.

So if you’re battling a low mood and poor motivation, taking an outdoor walk might go a long way toward helping you feel better, whether it’s a casual stroll around the block or a hike on a local trail.

Talk to Someone

When you’re in a funk, reaching out to another person can be a great way to break out of an uninspired mindset. Think about who might be a good source of support in moments like this.

Who can you talk to who might understand what you are feeling? Are you looking for someone who can listen or do you want someone who can inspire you to get moving?

If you aren’t in the mood to hang out with a friend or if your friend is unavailable, sometimes just getting out and just being in the presence of other people can be helpful.

Plan Something

Even if you don’t have the motivation to work on something at the moment, that doesn’t mean you can’t start making plans for what you might like to do in the future. Research suggests that mental imagery, or visualizing things you want to do, helps increase the motivation, expected pleasure, and anticipated reward of those planned activities.

Thinking about a future project or goal might involve doing things like visualizing the outcome, planning out the steps involved, or even creating a mood board for inspiration. 

Start Small

When it comes to finding the energy to do something, getting started is often the hardest part. So if you’re struggling with the doldrums, starting with something small can help. 

Instead of getting overwhelmed by a mountain of tasks you don’t have the mental or physical energy to tackle, pick one small thing that you can do—then do it. 

Easy tasks you might try to tackle include:

• Doing the dishes
• Making the bed
• Folding a load of laundry
• Answering one email
• Scheduling one appointment
• Clearing off the counters
• Paying a bill

Chores can be boring, but even the easiest tasks can start to feel overwhelming if you let them pile up. Starting with one small task is sometimes enough to get the ball rolling. Once you get done with that easy chore, you might think that tackling one more might not be so bad.

Write in a Journal

When you are struggling with difficult emotions, it can sometimes be helpful to write about them. Some research suggests that journaling can a useful mental health tool.

Often described as expressive writing or writing therapy, this approach has been shown in various studies to help decrease heart rate, relieve anxiety symptoms, and reduce depressive symptoms. 

Find What Works for You

If these ideas aren’t working for you, start looking for something that is right for your situation and what you are feeling. Some strategies that might help inspire you on those days where you don’t feel like doing anything include:

• Listing steps needed to achieve a goal
• Listening to music that inspires you
• Focusing on positive thoughts
• Reading a book or listening to an audiobook
• Cooking or ordering your favorite meal
• Practicing deep breathing
• Meditating

Dr. Dang also recommends trying interactive tools and apps, spending time with a pet, listening to a podcast, or going outside for a walk to get some stimulation. Self-care, such as getting enough sleep and exercise, are also essential, he says.

Assess Your Symptoms

If your mood persists and is accompanied by other symptoms, it may be a sign of depression. Some other symptoms to watch for include:

Your doctor or therapist may recommend therapy, medication, lifestyle changes, or a combination of these approaches.

Being sensitive means you sometimes overinterpret or overreact to perceived criticism or judgment. 

Sensitivity is not necessarily a bad thing. Having this quality means that you are observant, conscientious, and thoughtful. However, it can sometimes lead to overwhelming emotions when faced with social conflict, criticism, or rejection.

If you tend to be a highly sensitive person, you are more likely to sense social threats. But with this high sensitivity comes increased reactivity, which might cause you to misread signals from others.

You might look for ways to avoid feeling hurt if you are overly sensitive. This can prevent you from engaging in social situations, pursuing career opportunities, enjoying close relationships, or being authentic in your interactions with others.

Managing your sensitivity effectively can help you remain empathetic and attentive without taking things too personally. This article discusses how to be less sensitive and explores how being too sensitive might negatively affect your life. Some ways to be less sensitive include:

• Building your emotional regulation skills
• Practicing mindfulness
• Writing about your feelings in a journal
• Not taking things personally
• Accepting yourself for who you are
• Becoming better at tolerating distress

6 Ways to Be Less Sensitive

While it is tempting to avoid situations that leave you feeling sensitive or overemotional, this coping tactic comes at a high cost. Avoiding social situations can leave you lonely and lacking in support. Turning down opportunities for advancement can hurt you professionally and damage your confidence. 

If you want to learn how to be less sensitive, the following steps are a good place to start:

Learn to Regulate Your Emotions

Emotional regulation is the ability to control your emotions, thoughts, and behaviors. Having this ability allows you to manage feelings of distress and disruptive emotions. Strengthening this ability can help you feel less sensitive and put feelings in perspective before acting on them.

One strategy for regulating emotions effectively is to utilize cognitive reframing to change how you think and feel about different situations. This process involves intentionally reinterpreting a situation to control your emotional reaction to it.

If someone offers feedback on a project at work, you might initially think something like, “I’m terrible at this!” or “Nobody appreciates my efforts!” You might use cognitive reappraisal to see the situation from a different perspective. For example, you might think, “My co-worker wants to help me do my best” or “Making those changes will really improve the project.”

Practice Mindfulness

Mindfulness is a practice that involves learning how to focus fully on the present moment without worrying about the past or future. Evidence has found that mindfulness can have a beneficial effect on conditions that are characterized by emotional dysregulation.

If you want to become less sensitive, mindfulness can boost self-awareness and improve your ability to regulate your emotions. This process takes time and effort, so consider setting aside some time each day to practice.

Try Journaling

Journaling about your emotional experiences can be a great way to gain more insight into how you feel and respond to the events in your life. By writing down your feelings, you can better make sense of what you are experiencing. Some ways that journaling can help you become less sensitive include:

Journaling can give you greater distance from your emotions. By stepping back and looking at what you are feeling more objectively, you’ll be better able to gauge whether your reaction is appropriate and realistic. 

Don’t Take Things Personally

Personalization is a cognitive bias that can often contribute to heightened sensitivity. This bias causes people to take everything personally, blaming themselves for things that are not their fault.  

One way to combat this tendency is to actively challenge negative thoughts. When you find yourself taking something too personally, ask yourself:

• Are there other factors involved that are also to blame?
• Are you jumping to conclusions or reading too much into what other people do or say?
• What are some alternative ways of thinking about the situation?

You can combat a tendency to take things too personally by working to give people the benefit of the doubt. Remember that they might not mean things the way they sound or that you might have misunderstood. Positive self-talk and focusing on your strengths can also help you feel less sensitive to such comments.

Practice Self-Acceptance

Highly sensitive people are also sometimes highly self-critical. By learning to be more self-accepting, people can combat the inner fear that always has them looking for signs of criticism, judgment, or rejection.

To be more self-accepting, look for ways to:

• Embrace yourself for who you are, including both your good quality and your negative ones.
• Recognize your strengths and appreciate them, but don’t try to compare yourself to others.
• Set boundaries for what you are willing and not willing to accept. 
• Keep a positive outlook and focus on using positive self-talk and affirmations to boost yourself up.
• Forgive yourself for the mistakes you may have made in the past; acknowledge the mistake and move on.  

Learn to Tolerate Distress

Criticism hurts, even when it is constructive or comes from a trusted source. While you cannot eliminate all criticism, there are strategies you can use to improve your ability to tolerate the sting of it.

For example, you might be upset if you ask a friend for a favor and they turn you down. If your distress tolerance is poor, you might get upset and tell yourself that your friend doesn’t really care.

Good distress tolerance, on the other hand, would help you manage these feelings in the moment so that you can look at them with a greater perspective later on. Instead of getting upset, you might tell yourself that your friend is busy and that you’ll ask again some other time.

Tactics that can improve your distress tolerance when you are feeling overly sensitive include:

• Staying busy to distract yourself from distressing emotions.
• Focusing your attention on someone else instead of ruminating on negative thoughts and emotions.
• Participating in an activity you enjoy to help soothe and give yourself comfort.
• Doing something to inspire opposing emotions, such as watching a funny movie or reading an exciting book.

Characteristics of Sensitive People

While being “too sensitive” is often viewed negatively, sensitive people have both strengths and challenges. They are good at sensing the emotions of others so they can be deeply empathetic. However, this emotional intelligence can sometimes cause them to feel overwhelmed by the feelings of others.

Potential Causes of Being Sensitive

It is normal to be attuned to the emotions and behaviors of others. Being too sensitive, however, can hinder your ability to function normally in your daily life. 

Some research indicates that sensitivity serves an evolutionary purpose. Genetics also plays a part. Research has shown that sensitivity tends to run in families.

Some other potential causes of being sensitive include:

• Fatigue: When you are tired, you are less able to manage your emotional responses. You might be more sensitive to other people’s behavior and more likely to misinterpret what they are saying.
• Low self-esteem: If you have low self-esteem, you may worry more about what others think about you. This can cause you to take things too personally and read to much into what others say and do.
• Mental health conditions: Anxiety and depression may cause you to feel more susceptible to sensitivity. 
• Negative self-talk: It’s hard to stay positive if you are your own worst critic. Constantly belittling yourself might lead you to think that others see you in the same negative light.
• Past trauma: Children who experience trauma are more likely to be highly sensitive as adults.
• Perfectionism: Being a perfectionist can make you more sensitive to criticism.

Benefits of Being Less Sensitive

While being sensitive has advantages, being too sensitive can create challenges in different areas of your life. Sensitivity means your feelings are easily hurt, often unintentionally. Finding ways to be less sensitive, at least in some ways, can benefit you in a variety of ways:

• You’re less likely to feel hurt: Emotional hurts can lead to shame, embarrassment, self-doubt, and low confidence. You might become anxious about interacting with others, even to the point that you avoid social situations to prevent having your feelings hurt. Being less sensitive can help minimize the risk of feeling hurt by social slights.
• You’ll feel less anxious: If you’re always worried about feeling hurt, you might experience social anxiety. This can ultimately lead to poor self-esteem, loneliness, isolation, depression, and poor social support. Being less sensitive can help you to feel less anxious about social situations.
• You’ll experience fewer conflicts: Another potential pitfall of being too sensitive is having conflicts with others. If you are easily hurt, you might misinterpret others’ words or overreact to minor slights. This can erode interpersonal relationships, leading to arguments and misunderstandings. Letting things go without feeling overly sensitive can minimize these conflicts.

Frequently Asked Questions

How can I become emotionally tougher?

Building your confidence and practicing mindfulness can help you feel emotionally stronger if you are a sensitive person. When you feel good about yourself and confident in your abilities, you’re less likely to take criticism personally.

Mindfulness can build self-awareness and help you recognize the thoughts contributing to excessive sensitivity. Once you recognize this happening, you can utilize different coping strategies to manage feelings of emotional distress.

Why am I so sensitive and cry so easily?

Emotionally empathetic people may cry more easily in response to emotional situations or stress. This tendency is sometimes stronger when you feel tired or stressed because your ability to regulate your emotions is often diminished.

Frequent crying can also be linked to personality traits such as neuroticism and emotional sensitivity or mental health conditions such as depression and anxiety. High stress levels and past traumas can also play a role.

Is emotional sensitivity a disorder?

Being sensitive is not a disorder, but it can sometimes be a sign of difficulty or a mental health conditions. Events such as stress, trauma, bereavement, and major life changes can cause you to feel more sensitive. Anxiety disorders also often lead to increased emotional sensitivity.

When you are trying to teach a new skill, whether it’s teaching your dog to sit or getting yourself to stop doomscrolling before bed, rewarding good behavior is often better than punishing mistakes. Positive reinforcement involves rewarding desirable behaviors, making such actions *more* likely to be repeated.

It’s a common concept in behavioral psychology that can be used to teach and strengthen behaviors. Think about it this way: when you do one thing and something good happens as a result, you’ll probably want to do the same thing again (and again) in the future so you can get those same effects. It’s why we show up at work every day and put in a little extra effort when preparing for a big exam. The payoffs for those actions (yay, money! good grades!) act as positive reinforcers, making the behavior more likely to occur again.

What Is Positive Reinforcement?

In operant conditioning, positive reinforcement involves the addition of a reinforcing stimulus following a behavior that makes it more likely that the behavior will occur again in the future. When a favorable outcome, event, or reward occurs after an action, that particular response or behavior will be strengthened.

You can probably think of quite a few positive reinforcers. Such reinforcers are sometimes just natural consequences of our actions, but they can also involve social (praise), tangible (money), or token (points) rewards.

No matter what type, research suggests that positive reinforcement can be highly effective for teaching and modifying behaviors in home, school, and therapy settings. If you’re interested in trying it, remember that timing matters. Rewards should be given quickly and on a schedule that encourages consistent, lasting responses.

Sometimes positive reinforcement occurs quite naturally. For example, when you hold the door open for someone, you might receive praise and a thank you. That affirmation serves as positive reinforcement and may make it more likely that you will hold the door open for people again in the future.

In other cases, someone might choose to use positive reinforcement very deliberately in order to train and maintain a specific behavior. An animal trainer, for example, might reward a dog with a treat after the animal shakes the trainer’s hand and pauses for a count of five. 

Basics of Operant Conditioning

Operant conditioning was introduced by the psychologist B. F. Skinner, who based the idea on Thorndike’s law of effect. The basic idea behind the law of effect is that the consequences of behavior determine whether that behavior happens again. Reinforced behaviors become strengthened, while punished behaviors are weakened.

Both reinforcement and punishment can either be positive or negative:

• Positive reinforcement is the addition of a positive outcome to strengthen behavior.
• Negative reinforcement is the removal of a negative outcome to strengthen a behavior.
• Positive punishment involves taking away a desired stimulus to weaken a behavior.
• Negative punishment involves applying an undesirable stimulus to weaken a behavior.

Examples of Positive Reinforcement

There are many examples of positive reinforcement in action. Consider the following scenarios:

• Praise: After you execute a turn during a skiing lesson, your instructor shouts out, “Great job!”
• Monetary rewards: At work, you exceed this month’s sales quota, so your boss gives you a bonus.
• Other rewards: For your psychology class, you watch a video about the human brain and write a paper about what you learned. Your instructor gives you 20 extra credit points for your work.

In each situation, the reinforcement is an additional stimulus occurring after the behavior that increases the likelihood that the behavior will occur again in the future.

Types of Positive Reinforcement

There are many different types of reinforcers that can be used to increase behaviors, but it is important to note that the type of reinforcer used depends on the individual and the situation.

• Natural reinforcers occur directly as a result of the behavior. For example, a student studies hard, pays attention in class, and does their homework. As a result, they get excellent grades.
• Social reinforcers involve expressing approval of a behavior, such as a teacher, parent, or employer saying or writing, “Good job” or “Excellent work.”
• Tangible reinforcers involve presenting actual, physical rewards such as candy, treats, toys, money, and other desired objects. While these types of rewards can be powerfully motivating, they should be used sparingly and with caution.
• Token reinforcers are points or tokens that are awarded for performing certain actions. These tokens can then be exchanged for something of value.

While gold stars and tokens might be very effective reinforcement for a second-grader, they are not going to have the same effect on a high school or college student.

Positive Reinforcement vs. Negative Reinforcement

The goal of both positive and negative reinforcement is to increase the likelihood that a behavior will occur again in the future. The difference is in how each accomplishes this.

Positive reinforcement adds something to strengthen behavior, while negative reinforcement removes something.

Uses for Positive Reinforcement

When used correctly, positive reinforcement can be very effective. It can be used in various settings to make desired changes to behavior or teach new behaviors.

• At home: Parents can use positive reinforcement to encourage kids to engage in all kinds of positive, desirable behavior. For example, a parent might use praise or other rewards to get a child to brush their teeth, get ready for bed, or clean up their room.
• In school: Teachers can also use positive reinforcement to help kids engage in desired classroom behavior. An example of positive reinforcement in the classroom would be praising a child for raising their hand or giving them a sticker on their reward chart for turning their homework in on time.
• In therapy settings: Therapists also use positive reinforcement to help teach new behaviors and coping skills. For example, positive reinforcement is commonly used as part of behavior modification, an intervention that focuses on reducing or eliminating maladaptive behaviors.

How to Use Positive Reinforcement

Positive reinforcement can be a useful learning tool in a wide variety of settings. There are things that you can do to make sure that it is used effectively.

Be Aware of Reinforcement Timing

Positive reinforcement is most effective when it occurs immediately after the behavior. Reinforcement should be presented enthusiastically and should occur frequently.

• Deliver reinforcement quickly. A shorter time between a behavior and positive reinforcement makes a stronger connection.
• Waiting risks reinforcing the wrong behaviors. The longer the time, the more likely an intervening behavior might accidentally be reinforced.

Use the Right Reinforcement Schedule

In addition to the timing and type of reinforcement used, the presentation schedule can also play a role in the strength of the response. Schedules of reinforcement can have a powerful influence on how strong a response is and how often it occurs.

When you first teach a new behavior, you would likely use a continuous reinforcement schedule, where you deliver positive reinforcement every single time the behavior occurs. Once the response is established, you would then switch to an intermittent or ratio schedule.

Avoid Reinforcing the Wrong Behaviors

It is important to note that positive reinforcement is not always a good thing. It can lead to desirable behaviors, but it can also strengthen undesirable behaviors.

For example, when a child misbehaves in a store, some parents might give them extra attention or even buy them a toy in an effort to stop the behavior. Children quickly learn that by acting out, they can gain attention from their parents or even acquire objects they want. Essentially, parents are reinforcing the misbehavior.

A better solution would be to use positive reinforcement when the child is displaying good behavior. Instead of rewarding the misbehavior, the parents would want to wait until the child behaves well and then reward that good behavior with praise, treats, or even a toy.

Takeaways

Positive reinforcement can be an effective learning tool when used appropriately. Sometimes this type of learning occurs naturally through normal interactions with the environment.

In other cases, parents, teachers, and therapists can use this behavioral technique to help teach new behaviors. When using positive reinforcement, it’s important to be thoughtful about the type of reinforcers and the schedule that you use to train the new behavior.

Friends with benefits is a relationship dynamic in which people who are friends or friendly with each other agree to be physically or sexually intimate, without the commitment or expectations typically associated with a traditional romantic relationship.

It is a type of casual arrangement that exists somewhere between a friendship and a romantic relationship. 

People in these types of relationships enjoy spending time together but do not have a commitment to one another, says Sabrina Romanoff, PsyD, a clinical psychologist and relationship expert.

If you’ve seen this dynamic in movies and shows, you may wonder whether it really works. In this article, we explore what a friends with benefits relationship could look like, how to determine whether it’s right for you, and some tips to help you make it work.

What Does a Friends With Benefits Relationship Look Like?

These are some of the key characteristics of a friends with benefits relationship:

• Friendship: As the name suggests, a friends with benefits relationship often starts with friendship. The people involved know each other to some degree, may share common interests, care about and respect each other, and enjoy spending time together as friends.
• Physical intimacy: The “benefits” of this arrangement may include sex and other forms of physical intimacy like kissing and cuddling, says Dr. Romanoff.
• Casual hangouts: These relationships may include casual hangouts like watching movies together, cooking each other dinner, having sleepovers, and spending time with each other’s friends, says Dr. Romanoff.
• Lack of expectations: These relationships are about enjoying each other’s company without any commitment or expectations that they will progress into a romantic relationship, says Dr. Romanoff.
• Non-exclusivity: Friends with benefits arrangements are often non-exclusive, with partners free to date other people if they like.
• Temporary: These relationships are often short-lived. They either evolve into a more committed relationship, return to friendship, or end altogether.

It’s important to note that friends with benefits relationships can look different for everyone. “There are no rules or guidelines for these relationships. They can vary widely based on the preferences of the people involved,” says Dr. Romanoff.

Is Being Friends With Benefits Right for You?

If you’re wondering whether a friends with benefits arrangement is right for you, here are some factors to consider.

Being friends with benefits might work for you if:

• You want intimacy without commitment: This relationship is right for you if you want the intimacy of a relationship but don’t want commitment or monogamy, says Dr. Romanoff. It may be particularly beneficial for people who don’t have the time, energy, or desire for a committed relationship but still want a physical connection with someone.
• You don’t want the complications of a relationship: This arrangement may work for you if you want the benefits of a relationship without the more challenging aspects of a commitment like compromise, vulnerability, sacrifice, and trying to meet many of each other’s needs and expectations, says Dr. Romanoff.
• You enjoy your friend but don’t see it working out long-term: A friends with benefits relationship can work for you if you’re attracted to a friend and like spending time with them, but don’t see yourself in an exclusive, committed relationship with them. This may be because of value differences, like if you ultimately want marriage or children and your friend doesn’t.

On the other hand, being friends with benefits might not be a good idea for you if:

• You tend to get emotionally attached and have trouble keeping it casual.
• You tend to develop expectations and get your feelings hurt if they’re not met.
• You don’t do well with non-monogamy and get extremely possessive and jealous of other people in your partner’s life.
• You are in love with the person and hope the arrangement will turn into a relationship.
• You don’t do well with uncertainty and need to know what the future holds.

How to Make Being Friends With Benefits Work

If you decide to pursue a friends with benefits relationship, these are some tips that can help you make it work:

• Communicate clearly: Communication is key to making these relationships work, says Dr. Romanoff. It’s important to define the relationship and discuss the boundaries so there are no misunderstandings.
• Be honest: It’s crucial to be honest with the other person—and yourself—about what you want and how you’re feeling, says Dr. Romanoff.
• Establish ground rules and boundaries: Agreeing on rules and establishing boundaries can help form a foundation trust and stability in the dynamic. It can be helpful to establish ground rules around things like how often you will meet, which activities are allowed and which are off-limits, whether you will see other people and what to share or not about your dating lives, what birth control you will use, and what you will or won’t tell others about your arrangement, says Dr. Romanoff.
• Respect each other and each other’s boundaries shared: For this relationship to work, it’s important to honor each other’s boundaries and privacy. Avoid violating the rules of the relationship and treat each other with consideration, kindness, and mutual respect.
• Have regular check-ins: Dr. Romanoff recommends having regular check-ins with each other about how it’s going. She also recommends checking in with yourself to see whether the relationship is still serving you and what you want–just because it worked for you in the beginning does not mean it will continue to work down the line.
• Manage your jealousy: If the arrangement is non-exclusive, you or your partner might also be seeing other people. Feelings of jealousy may arise and it’s important for you to manage these feelings without taking it out on your partner. Clearly communicate what you are feeling, be honest with yourself about what’s working and what isn’t, and practice processing and managing difficult emotions like jealousy that may arise.
• Focus on the present: Remember that this relationship is casual and not intended to lead to a committed romantic relationship. Avoid dwelling on the past or projecting into the future.
• Know when to end things: If you find that you’re no longer having fun or on the same page as your partner, it might be time to end the arrangement. Ending things amicably and respectfully can help preserve the friendship.

Does Being Friends With Benefits Lead to Dating?

Being friends with benefits can sometimes lead to dating or a more serious romantic relationship; however, that’s not always the case.

There is no hard and fast rule about where this dynamic leads, says Dr. Romanoff. “There are many variables that impact this trajectory.”

If you find that you’ve developed romantic feelings for someone you’re in this arrangement with, it’s important to tell them how you feel.

Once you share your feelings, you can either work together to meet each other’s needs or end the arrangement to find someone who you can help you reach your relationship goals, says Dr. Romanoff.

It’s not a good idea to stay in this arrangement if you have deeper feelings for the person and want more than they’re giving you. Being friends with benefits can give you a false sense of hope with someone who doesn’t want the same things as you and keep you from meeting your relationship goals with someone who does.

Closing considerations

Navigating a friends with benefits situation can be easy and straightforward for some people, and not so much for others—so if you choose to try this relationship dynamic it’s important to proceed with caution and check in with your friend often.

This type of relationship can have lots of benefits, and can be particularly helpful when it comes to having physical intimacy needs met. It can also help you in learning more about what you like, practicing getting your sexual needs met in a mutually consenting way, and having fun and enjoying your sexuality and connections with others.

If you’ve ever felt sluggish and exhausted on certain days of the month, you might have wondered when you are most tired during your menstrual cycle. During your menstrual cycle, you will likely feel the most tired during the luteal phase (post-ovulation) when estrogen levels drop. The corresponding rise in progesterone levels also has a depressant effect, leaving you tired and sluggish.

Mood changes and discomfort are common before and during a person’s menstrual cycle. You’ve likely learned what to expect from your body during menstruation, but hormonal fluctuations affect your body throughout the entire month.

Let’s explore the sequence of events your body goes through each month and learn more about identifying these changes so you can maximize your mood and productivity during different points in your cycle.

What Is Menstruation?

Menstruation occurs when the body is not pregnant and not preparing for a potential pregnancy. The lining flows from the uterus through the cervix before it is eventually expelled from the vagina. Menstrual blood is a combination of blood and tissue from the uterus.

During your period, your estrogen levels rise slightly, and your progesterone levels dip. If you feel like laying low during this phase, don’t fight the urge. It’s essential to listen to your body and practice self-care, even if it means not checking off every item on your task list.

The Follicular Phase

This phase of your cycle begins on day one of your cycle, or the first day of your period. During the follicular phase, your body begins to develop follicles on the ovaries. A mature ovum, or egg, will develop within one of the follicles between cycle days 10 and 14.

Estrogen and progesterone levels rise during the follicular phase. This promotes follicle development and helps the uterus lining grow and thicken to support a potential pregnancy.

What Does This Mean For You?

While each person is different, the follicular phase is often when your energy levels will be at their highest point during the month. It is important to remember that other factors can also play a role in how you feel, including things like exercise, nutrition, and sleep.

A lot is going on in your body during this point of your cycle, but you’re probably feeling pretty good despite it.

Dietary energy intake also fluctuates throughout your cycle. A 2023 study found that energy intake appears lower during the follicular phase, decreasing in the days prior to and including the day of ovulation.

The Ovulation Phase

Ovulation occurs around day 14 of a typical 28-day cycle. This is the point during your cycle when the mature egg is released from the ovary. If intercourse is timed properly, conception may take place during the ovulation phase.

In the days leading up to ovulation, your body experiences a surge in the luteinizing hormone (LH), which gives the ovary the go-ahead to release the egg. Estrogen and testosterone levels also peak during ovulation, so you may notice your body feels a bit different around ovulation day.

The ovulation process typically lasts for about 24 hours, but high hormone levels can last for about three to four days on either end from when the egg is released.

The Luteal Phase

This phase refers to the time between ovulation and menstruation; the luteal phase is also known as the second half of the menstrual cycle. It most commonly occurs between days 15 and 28 of your cycle.

Once the egg has been released during ovulation, the follicle itself begins to change. The empty sac from which the egg erupts is referred to as the corpus luteum. This new structure produces progesterone to thicken the uterine lining in the event a fertilized egg implants, as well as some estrogen.

If pregnancy occurs, your body will begin producing human gonadotropin (hCG) to support the corpus luteum. Progesterone levels will also continue to rise. However, if the egg has not been fertilized, progesterone and estrogen levels will drop in preparation for your body to shed the thickened uterine lining during your next period.

What Does This Mean For You?

How your body reacts during the luteal phase depends on whether or not pregnancy has occurred.

Those pesky PMS symptoms may also begin popping up, making you feel more inclined to curl up on the couch than hit the ground running.

Energy intake during the luteal phase may also increase, although researchers note this can vary across individuals and cycles.

Understanding Your Cycle

Each individual’s body is unique, and understanding your individual cycle is crucial for nurturing your physical and mental health.

Some people prefer to track their cycles the old-fashioned way on a calendar. Still, if you’re more tech-savvy, multiple fertility apps are available to provide insight into what’s happening with your body throughout the month.

A Word From Verywell

Your menstrual cycle is more than just your period—it’s the sequence of events that occurs in your body each month. Recognizing how your body responds to each phase of your cycle can help you identify physical and behavioral patterns that occur throughout the month, allowing you to reach peak productivity while maximizing self-care.

When we listen to our bodies, it allows us to respond accordingly to its signals, bettering our overall health. If you have questions or concerns about your menstrual cycle, contact your health provider for an evaluation.