How a Therapist Can Help You Cope with a Cancer Diagnosis

Mental health is complicated and impacted by many factors, including genetics, environment, support systems, and more. It is never shameful to need support for your mental health, and anyone can struggle. In fact, in certain circumstances, it is almost expected to need support.

It’s completely understandable to experience complex emotions following a cancer diagnosis, and many people work with therapists while undergoing cancer treatment to treat psychological symptoms brought on by the stress of diagnosis and treatment.

Kristi Miller, LPC-MH, has been in remission from cancer for 11 years and was kind enough to share her expertise as both a mental health professional and a cancer survivor. While she emphasized that everyone’s journey is unique and different, she shared her experience and ways that a therapist can help you cope if you or a loved one has been diagnosed with cancer.

The Role of a Therapist in Cancer Care

A major medical issue like cancer treatment has significant, lingering impacts on mental health, even after the patient is in remission. While a variety of factors impact how an individual will respond psychologically, it is clear that a cancer diagnosis is a major life event that negatively impacts mental health. You might be scared that they will not survive or will never fully recover.

You might feel significant stress, or you could struggle to cope with feeling physically sick as a result of your illness or the treatment. You might feel angry. A therapist can provide a safe space to process all of these things and attend to your mental health during this time.

Miller shares that it is important for the therapist to “meet the person where they are” and support them in whatever way is best for that individual.

A therapist can be part of the individual’s treatment team, collaborating with other providers. When Miller got her diagnosis, her therapist consulted with an oncologist about her care, which helped considerably. She shares that she received her diagnosis shortly after losing a family member and had thoughts of refusing treatment altogether. The oncologist helped the therapist connect her reluctance to start treatment to a depressive and bereavement episode rather than her true desires.

Therapeutic Approaches to Coping with Cancer

While the primary predictor of whether therapy will be effective is the relationship between the therapist and client, there are specific approaches and interventions that research has shown to be beneficial. Of course, no approach is a miracle fix, and you might find that something with a strong evidence base simply is not a good fit for you. These orientations can be beneficial:

• Cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) is an approach to mental health care that involves connecting how thoughts, emotions, and behaviors interact to identify how negative and unhelpful thoughts influence our mental health. It has strong evidence backing for managing symptoms of depression and anxiety, which many cancer patients experience.
• Mindfulness-based therapy: Mindfulness therapy helps reduce stress, anxiety, and other emotions that come up as a result of a cancer diagnosis by staying in the present. This can be beneficial as it helps people from jumping into the future about worst-case scenarios.
• Dialectical behavioral therapy (DBT) is a therapy designed to increase distress tolerance for big, unpleasant emotions, such as those that can arise following a cancer diagnosis. One component of DBT is radical acceptance, or fully embracing and accepting reality regardless of how we feel about it.
• Acceptance and commitment therapy (ACT). ACT focuses on accepting challenging thoughts and feelings without trying to control or change them.

Support for Different Stages of the Journey

Regardless of where you are in your journey, a therapist can help you cope with the emotional and psychological impact of cancer. Whether you were just diagnosed, are in remission, or are nearing the end of life, you deserve the mental health support that you need.

At the start of her cancer journey, Miller shared that she really needed space to be upset: “There was a lot of pressure for me to feel like I needed to be strong and brave, and be a fighter and a warrior and all that kind of thing, and really I just wanted to fall apart.”

Miller noted that even members of her treatment team took this approach, telling her, “You’re fine, you don’t need to even think about that,” which did not help her and made things worse when her cancer turned out to be more advanced than they initially thought. This attitude made her feel like “a loser” for not being optimistic enough: ”I wasn’t demonstrating that attitude because I didn’t feel it!”

Even if you are fully in remission, you might feel anxious that the cancer could return or fear another medical issue coming up in the future. A therapist can help you manage these emotions.

If you are near the end of life, a therapist who specializes in end-of-life care can help you come to terms with your mortality and make plans for a peaceful death. Death doulas also offer support to those who are near the end of their lives.

Special Considerations

Anyone going through cancer is at risk for depression, anxiety, and other mental health concerns from the stress and trauma of this illness. However, the specific needs might vary based on cultural considerations, personal values, and other factors. You deserve a treatment team that gets you and your needs and understands your background.

The mental health impact of cancer not only affects the patient. If a loved one has cancer, you still deserve support as you go through this process with them. Caregivers often benefit from their own mental health treatment. Parents raising a child who has cancer often need to work through their own mental health to show up for their child.

Additional Support Resources

If you are looking for an individual therapist, TherapyDen’s directory lets you filter providers who specialize in supporting people with cancer. CancerCare is an organization that helps those experiencing cancer connect with qualified mental health professionals.

The American Cancer Society offers online and location-specific education and support services for those with cancer and their loved ones in every phase of the medical journey. Similarly, the Cancer Support Community can connect you with local resources, education, and online community support. In-person cancer support groups can also help you feel less alone by meeting others who are experiencing a similar journey.

Key Takeaways

• Going through a cancer diagnosis and treatment may be one of the most stressful things a person can experience, and your mental health is just as important as your medical care during this time.
• A therapist can help you process your diagnosis, work through mental health issues that arise or worsen during your treatment, and simply create space for you to feel your feelings.
• There is no one way to cope with a cancer diagnosis, and it is not a journey that has shortcuts. Miller shares, “You can come out better at the end, but it’s a wall of dirt and a long process.” “I just want to stress that everybody’s journey is different, so if you don’t have that stronger-than attitude, you don’t have to feel guilty,” she adds.