Mixing Friend Groups? A Relationship Coach Shares What to Do (And What Not to Do)

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I love throwing dinner parties. It’s become a passion project to weave together a room of loose threads and watch them tighten into a connected web—one that holds the space, catalyzes connection, and continues long after the plates are cleared. There’s something so magical about seeing the people you hoped would get along swap numbers, and the way a night refuses to end with everyone ending up in the kitchen eating leftover dessert.

Research shows we are wired to connect and a sense of belonging can provide incredible healing benefits and self-actualization to virtually every facet of our lives. Naturally, mixing friend groups sounds like a great idea. Better health, a stronger support system, and more memories with the people you love. Win-win! 

But in reality, personalities can clash and awkward silence can ensue. Whenever I plan events and mix old and new groups, I’ve noticed how unexpectedly tricky this process can be. I do believe mixing friend groups can work. But it depends on the crowd. Read on to learn some tips about how to introduce some friend groups to each other and how to keep others separate. 

The Psychology of Friend Groups

“A strong friend group provides a safety net during tough times and provides us with resilience to tackle life’s challenges,” says Jenny Maenpaa, LCSW. “Knowing we have people who care about us can reduce stress and loneliness. They play a significant role in shaping our sense of identity. Being part of a group also fulfills a fundamental human need for connection. It reminds us that we’re not alone in this world.”

Dr. Mikki Lee Elembaby, a licensed psychologist at Clarity Therapy NYC, explains that the makeup of friend groups involves a mix of shared identity, situational experiences, values, unspoken rules, and individual roles—such as the peacekeeper or the planner—which all influence the social dynamics and how the group functions. 

A strong friend group provides a safety net during tough times and provides us with resilience to tackle life’s challenges.

So, it’s totally natural to have different dimensions of your personality amplified (or toned down) depending on the people you’re hanging out with. My work friends see me as the type-A organizer who never misses a detail, while my spiritual friends know the esoteric side that leads by intuition and faith. I switch between these versions seamlessly, but when these two groups come together, the circumstances of how I show up can be a different story. 

How to Mix a Friend Group

If you’re looking to connect your friends, here are a few things that can set you up for success:

Look for Shared Interests

“If you’re introducing different friends and hoping to form a cohesive group, try starting with common ground, such as introducing friends who share at least one thing in common,” Elembaby says. “This can be a common interest, life experience, or just that they have a similar sense of humor. This will be easier than trying to blend in with wildly different friends who don’t have anything in common with each other, leading you to play social referee. 

Introduce Others at a Purposeful Event

The best way to mix friend groups is at an event with a built-in intention, shared experience, or a common interest, such as a birthday party, game night, housewarming, concert, themed activity, culinary experience, or wedding. When there’s a theme to focus on, it takes the pressure off. “Common activities can serve as neutral ground where people can bond without pressure,” Maenpaa says.

Be the Host With the Most

“You can start small by facilitating one-on-one interactions first, or you can just throw everyone in the same room and hope for the best,” Elembaby says. “It really depends on what you feel most comfortable with. What matters is that you make everyone feel as included as possible.”

Encourage a Foundation of Respect and Inclusivity

“Encourage everyone to appreciate each other’s differences, whether it’s in humor, communication styles, or interests. Highlight the unique strengths each person brings to the group,” Maenpaa says. When you have a warm attitude and lavish the people you love with kindness and compliments, people want to interact more with each other.  

Set Realistic Expectations

“Pay attention to how people interact,” Maenpaa recommends. This helps respect everyone’s sovereignty and avoid disappointment. “If someone seems left out or uncomfortable, gently bring them into the conversation or activity.”

Research indicates having a large network of different ages, races, incomes, and educational backgrounds leads to greater social cohesion and personal well-being. People in healthy friend groups tend to have lower stress, higher life satisfaction, adaptability, and more resilience. 

A huge benefit of blending your friend groups is the opportunity to embody a cohesive, singular identity without the need for compartmentalization. You don’t have to switch between different versions and instead, you can fully embrace your whole self. Having all of your friends witness you in every dimension of your being can be transformative for growth and a testament to personal development. 

Plus, your community feels more communal. As you expand to a bigger group, emotional support broadens and there are more perspectives to consider. If one friend is sick, another friend can show up with soup. If someone is going through a hard time, the entire group can rally and support them as a whole. We don’t have to go at it alone anymore.

The Challenges of Mixing a Friend Group

Despite your best intentions, sometimes friend groups don’t play nicely with each other. Here are some things to consider: 

  • They just don’t mesh well. Jealousy, cliques, evolving group roles, or perceived closeness can create tension, especially when some friends have a longer history compared to others. Elembaby notes clashing personalities or louder friends dominating low-key personalities may also make it harder for people to get along. “It’s better to let subgroups form naturally rather than force the entire group together,” she says. 
  • Mismatched outlooks. If your friend groups are in other life stages or have different values, it can be hard to find enough common ground for a more solid friendship to thrive.
  • Personal preference. Some friends might prefer having a smaller circle because they value nurturing smaller connections, feel anxious about being expected to get along with everyone, or find large group settings draining.
  • Feeling left out. Sometimes, you might wind up in a situation where your best friends start hanging out without you. This might stir up worries that you no longer belong and that you’re being excluded. This is a common anxiety, and while it’s positive that your friends are getting along, it can also trigger tough emotions that you’re being forgotten, replaced, ignored, rejected, or disposed of.

When Mixing Friends Goes Wrong

If it doesn’t go well, here’s what to do:

Acknowledge the Issue

“If tensions or discomfort arise, don’t ignore them. Address the issue calmly and compassionately,” Maenpaa says. “Encourage them to listen actively to the concerns and viewpoints without rushing to judgment. This can foster empathy and mutual understanding. Sometimes, simply naming the problem can help the group move forward.”

Accept It

Just because you love them doesn’t mean they have to love each other. Let go of any pressure and allow them to connect on their terms. This will promote healthy communication and respect at the bare minimum. If you force it, they may feel resentful.

Mix Groups Consciously

Reflect on the last get-together. Maybe the vibe was off because the setting wasn’t right or certain personalities didn’t get along. By being thoughtful about these elements, you can create future environments where everyone can reasonably get along at the times that matter most. 

Let Go of Perfection

“If certain personalities clash or someone consistently feels excluded, it might be worth reconsidering how the group interacts. Smaller, more intimate gatherings might work better than large group activities,” Maenpaa says. “Not every friend group will come together perfectly, and that’s okay. It’s natural for some people to connect more deeply than others. Focus on nurturing the connections that do work.”

Strengthen Your Friendship

Friendships aren’t zero-sum. If your best friends unexpectedly hit it off way better than you thought they would, it doesn’t diminish your unique bond. A growing community is like an ever-expanding ecosystem where connection is compounded. Instead of feeling hurt that your friends are hanging out without you, see it as a sign that you have great taste in people and that love is being multiplied-not taken away.

When you feel threatened, that’s an important insecurity to acknowledge. Don’t repress your emotions. It’s important to bring this up with your friends, share what you’re feeling, and ask for more quality time. Being vulnerable about your fears will bring you closer together.

Bottom Line

I love the magic of bringing my friend groups and seeing all of the people I care about the most in the same room. At the same time, I also really enjoy one-on-one settings where each connection can flourish.

Quality matters more than quantity, and that principle applies to mixing friend groups. My advice is to bring people together because it feels meaningful and enriching, not just for the sake of it. Trust what feels right for you and your friends, and let the connections unfold naturally.


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Does Lemon Water Effect Energy?: The Experiment, Benefits, Challenges

by with No Comment Dating Tips, Guide and Advice


My mornings are hectic. I wake up, usually with a couple of small feet in my face, wondering what day of the week it is. Life of a mom, right? So my morning routine needs to be simple, quick and no-fuss.

I don’t have time to meditate, stretch, do a morning walk, reflect on my life goals, and write in my gratitude journal. The kids are screaming bloody murder. I have to brush my teeth, wipe that gunk out of my eyes, make breakfasts, and pack lunches. So, by the time I have a moment to myself, I’m scarfing a banana before running upstairs to my laptop to start my day. 

Recently, my social media feed has been filled with influencers raving about how drinking lemon water in the morning has changed their lives. They’re touting the benefits of lemon water, including claims about better focus, more energy, and improved overall well-being. Is it really worth the hype? It seems easy enough, so I decided to try it myself. But first, I needed to consult some experts.

Benefits of Lemon Water

Dr. Amy Shah, a board-certified physician, nutrition specialist, author, and spokesperson for Nature’s Bounty, clarifies that no studies have shown that lemon water has any direct health benefits; however, many people have experienced anecdotal and theoretical benefits. 

Hydration

Staying hydrated is crucial for our brain and body since it’s an essential nutrient responsible for regulating our temperature, lubricating joints, and maintaining cardiovascular functioning. Even a body water loss of 1 to 2% can negatively affect cognitive performance.

Water is vital for brain function because it transports nutrients and eliminates toxins and inflammatory substances. Dehydration may contribute to mental health disorders. A study showed that drinking less than 2 glasses of plain water was associated with a 73% and 54% increased risk of depression among men and women, respectively. 

Some people find it difficult to drink plain water regularly because it has no taste compared to more interesting beverages. However, since sodas and juices are typically high in sugar, lemon water might be a healthier alternative for staying hydrated.

Vitamin C

Among all the citrus fruits, lemons contain the highest vitamin C content. Dr. Shah explains that vitamin C in lemons is considered to help with lowering cortisol levels, which contributes to less stress and a more positive mindset. 

Kathleen (Kat) Garcia-Benson, RDN, CSSD, LD, NASM-CPT, NBC-HWC, a registered dietitian specializing in PCOS, women’s health, sports nutrition and digestive health, adds that it’s important to note that other fruits, like oranges, strawberries, and kiwi, are much higher in vitamin C as alternatives.

Gut Health

Dr. Shah shares that some people believe that lemon water helps digestion and promotes better gut health.

Therefore, it appears that the benefits of lemon water are based on people’s individual experiences. I’m excited to see how it goes for me.

Drinking Lemon Water Every Morning

Garcia-Benson advises that if anyone wants to start drinking lemon water every morning, it’s important to consider their personal health needs. 

She explains that the acidic nature of lemons can contribute to tooth enamel erosion over time. Using a straw and rinsing with water afterward can help minimize risk. Also, lemon water isn’t ideal for everyone because citrus fruits can trigger acid reflux or digestive discomfort for some people. 

The night before, I cut a few lemons, put them in a glass container and stored them in the fridge. My plan was to drop a wedge or two into my warm water every morning. Here’s how it went:

Day 1

It’s 7 a.m. on a Thursday. I woke up once last night to use the bathroom and took a while before going back to sleep. I’m feeling slightly groggy but after opening the blinds and looking outside at the sun, I get a small burst of energy. I open the fridge and grab the glass container of lemons while getting the peanut butter for the kids’ breakfasts. 

I drop and squeeze two lemon wedges into my cup and fill it with hot water from my water boiler. I take a small sip, and it’s a bit too hot, so I add some room-temperature water. I pause for a moment to breathe in the aroma of the steam from my cup. The smell of lemon wakes me up. The warm water makes the lemon extra acidic, and it slightly burns my throat. My teeth feel a bit gritty, so I drink some plain water to rinse them. 

I eat a banana and toast for breakfast before heading to my office to write. For lunch, I have leftover fried rice and an orange. I do my Pilates workout around 2 pm and get the kids from school. Overall, my energy levels don’t feel any different.

Day 2

I had a decent night’s sleep. It’s Friday, and the morning is a bit relaxed. I woke up earlier, and my son was still sleeping when I headed downstairs to the kitchen. I took time to prepare my lemon water. I’m ravenous at lunch. I made myself an egg and cheese sandwich around 11 a.m. 

I do a yoga routine at 1:30 p.m. During twists, my belly felt more relaxed and less bloated, and the movements were smoother. On Fridays, the kids have dance class, and I usually read my book while I wait. But this time, I felt like going for a short walk. My energy levels don’t fluctuate much throughout the day, but I can’t wait for the kids to go to bed. I’m looking forward to reading a couple of chapters in my book. 

Day 3

Sleep wasn’t great because my son came in and interrupted my night. He kept tossing and turning whenever I was about to fall asleep. I get to sleep in for 15 minutes because it’s not a school day. My energy levels are lower in the morning, and I’m feeling cranky. I make my lemon water and quickly down the thing without thinking.

After breakfast, we head to the library to return books and go on a scavenger hunt. We come home, and I heat leftover noodles for our lunches. Then we head over to my parents’ for dinner. They made roast chicken and pasta. By 7 p.m., I’m pooped and very much looking forward to getting the kids to sleep so I could start my bedtime routine. My husband and I almost passed out while watching “The Penguin.”

Day 4

It’s a slow start to Sunday. Everyone sleeps in, and we get up at 8:30 a.m. I drink my lemon water mindfully. The smell reinvigorates the back of my throat and my taste buds. After breakfast, the kids hop on their bikes, and we head to the park. I bring my book while they make loops through the playground and weave around trees. After an hour, we headed back home. It was chilly, so I made dumpling soup for lunch. It warmed my stomach. 

I had a good level of energy in the afternoon, so we walked down to the harbor to get fresh donuts from our favorite bakery. I usually share a large one with my husband, but today, I ate a whole one. For dinner, I make chili, garlic toast, and air fryer cheese fries. We have ice cream for dessert. By bedtime, my stomach is quite full.

Day 5

It’s Monday, and we wake up late. I only have 20 minutes to brush my teeth, prepare breakfasts, pack lunches and get the kids out the door. I start editing an article when I realize I had forgotten to drink my lemon water. I’d already had breakfast, so it was a nice palate cleanser to help refresh the taste of peanut butter toast from my mouth. After yesterday’s heavy dinner, I wasn’t too hungry for lunch, so I made half a wrap with tuna, cheese, and cucumbers. I do a leg workout around 2 p.m. and get the kids from school.

I take the kids to their swimming lessons and read a couple of chapters from my book. I haven’t eaten anything since lunch, and my stomach is growling. I can’t wait to dive into the leftovers when we get home. I’m hangry and exhausted, but after finishing a bowl of chilli, my mood and energy levels stabilize. 

Day 6

My night’s sleep was terrible. I had to use the bathroom twice and probably got about five hours of actual rest. I don’t feel like getting out of bed, but the kids are up. I pour my warm cup of lemon water, and the sourness wakes my body up. The morning is a blur as I have two major deadlines and need to submit my articles by the end of the day. I sip the rest of my lemon water while working. 

I’m pretty tired in the afternoon, so I make green tea. I manage to complete a few sets of chest and back exercises before picking up the kids from school. It’s super rainy today; the whole family is feeling out of sorts. The kids are at each other’s throats, and I want the day to end. My husband and I get the kids to bed; we get a second wind to stay up watching the mindblowing last episode of “The Penguin,” which kept my eyes open. 

Day 7

It’s Wednesday, and the kids get off school early today. My husband and I were exhausted from the night before. We didn’t head to bed until after midnight. The morning routine was uneventful, except I should not have had my lemon water with breakfast. The yogurt and oats did not mix well. My stomach felt odd, and I had some funny-tasting burps before lunch. 

By the afternoon, my tummy settles. I have some peanut butter and crackers before getting the kids from school. My energy is lower than usual, so I made an earl grey tea with some milk while the kids get ready for their skating lessons. I feel more focused during the evening and am able to finish an outline for an article before heading to bed. 

Takeaways

I did not notice a major change in my digestion. My bowel movements stayed the same, once a day in the morning after breakfast. However, although I sometimes get heartburn or indigestion when I eat a large meal before bed, I did not experience any tummy troubles on Sunday. The lemon water may have helped me digest the heavier foods.

I don’t find drinking plain water challenging. However, if you struggle to stay hydrated, lemon water might be an appealing way to get those glasses in. For me, it was something to look forward to after waking up. The lemon smell can be reinvigorating and refreshing if you take the time to sip it mindfully. Although my mornings are hectic, I tried to slow down to enjoy the lemon water. But there were a couple of days where I felt like it was checking a box.

Garcia-Benson shares that the tartness and scent of lemon may provide a slightly stimulating effect. A study looked at the effect of inhaling lemon fragrance on the brain using MRI scans. It showed that smelling lemons was linked to an increase in alertness as it activated different parts of the brain involved in emotion processing, such as the thalamus, olfactory bulb, and hypothalamus.

Should You Drink Lemon Water To Boost Your Energy?

I did not feel any significant changes in my energy after drinking lemon water in the morning. The times I had an energy boost was when I had tea that contained caffeine. However, your experience may be different.

Garcia-Benson explains that drinking lemon water in the morning combines the benefits of hydration with the potential mood-boosting effects of lemons. Hydration supports overall physiological function, including mood, energy, and alertness. However, she advises that people should not use lemon water as a cure-all.

“While it can be a refreshing way to start the day, lemon water alone isn’t a substitute for a balanced breakfast or other wellness habits,” says Garcia-Benson.

While it can be a refreshing way to start the day, lemon water alone isn’t a substitute for a balanced breakfast or other wellness habits.

—
KATHLEEN (KAT) GARCIA-BENSON, RDN, CSSD, LD, NASM-CPT, NBC-HWC

There are other natural ways to boost your energy and wellness. Moving your body regularly can help wake your body up and reduce feelings of fatigue. Eating a nutrient-dense diet with plenty of fruits, vegetables, lean protein, and whole grains can do wonders for your mind. 

Practicing good sleep hygiene, such as going to bed at the same time, will help you start the day feeling rested and energized. Lastly, make time to relax and have fun; for instance, connecting with friends or reading a good book can help you manage stress, recharge, and lighten your mood.


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